KAHWIN

huhu...

last time during high school days, I just laughed at my old friends' idea on marriage cause that time it was too early for us to talk on marriage. I even told my old friends that it will be such a miracle if someone like me getting married early. Boys have bad impression on me even till today cause I have this 'little' problem called arrogance towards boys, especially those I hardly know. Plus, I am not a matured person. I still act childishly even till today without  realization. pity me to be born in a all-boys-family while I have bad attitudes toward boys near me. 

somehow, lately this word turns out spooky for me. I'm getting paranoid and scared of hearing it  = . =!! . this word has become taboo to my ears and eyes. and it hurts me every time people around me talking bout marriage. my friends can't wait of getting married. some even thinking of getting married before graduation. homaigoodness... I can't see myself attending my friend's ceremony with goldfish eyes. I should buy a pair of shade and a black shawl. dermmm..  ermmm... what am I thinking?? Am I attending a funeral?  huhu...

I know I can't stop them from thinking bout marriage since they are not teenagers anymore. sooner or later there will be invitations for me to attend. I can't forever running from reality. is this what are my former teacher's thought, seeing her old friends getting married while herself still unmarried? I know I have laughing at my spinster English teacher. I mean laughing at my friends badmouthing her. they were hilarious. I never meant to laughed her for not getting married. huhu... does karma really exist?  I hope not cause there's too much sins done. 

T . T

I know it is stupid for me thinking bout this but I have too much time to think all the stupid things that cross my mind. three weeks of holidays will kill me for sure. huhu...